5 Minute Mind – Stranger in My House

This is a writing sprint. Please excuse spelling and grammatical errors.

WHile pondering what to write about this morning, I read a story prompt that said to describe a mysterious stranger. That lead to me thinking about the song, stranger in my house. The version I am talking about is Tamia.

Specifically, I thought about the line, “could it be, that the stranger is me, have i changed so drastically, is it i want more for me and you remain the same?”

I stopped at those lyriucs and thought about relating them to my own journey. In my case though, the stranger in my house is the one I see in my mind’s mirror. I’ve gone through a lot of changes these past several years, all spurned by my diagnosis of type 2 diabetes a few years ago.

Diabetes has ravaged my family, inc,uding things like amputations and blindness. When I was diagnosed, after about a month of processing that I decided I Was not going to go down that path and began changing who I was.

The person I have become is much healthier both phyussically and psychologically. It’s a journey, not a fix.

P.S. I fleshed this one out and you can read that version here.

5 Minute Mind – Scapegoats and Auld Ang Syne

This is a writing sprint. Please excuse spelling and grammatical errors.

SO many people have said to me something along the lines of can’t wait for this year to be over, or something along those lines. I know I cannot be the only one who has heard this same sentiment echoed by various talking heads from your preferred media platforms.

Here’s the thing though, 2020 isn’t your scapegoat. For obvious reasons, succh as COVID-19, this year had its craptacular moments. I caution you though against taking everything you have perceived as being wrong, squishing it into a round mass, and chucking it at the back of 2020’s head. Thing of it is, the back of 2020’s head is the face of 2021.

What I mean is you really should assess..is that correct, always lookes like asses..Anyway, as easy as it is to lump it all together, there are plenty of parts that, upon further examination, will reveal themselves to be a part of your recurring problems.

Don’t blame the year, don’t blame yourself…sind the rel probl

5 Minute Mind – Christmas Presence

This is a writing sprint. Please excuse spelling and grammatical errors.

I’ll be in my apartment alone for Christmas this year, and perhaps as weird as it may seem, I think social distancing has prepared me for it. Of coiurse there are oangs of loneliness and missing out on being with people, but I am trying to accept that as part of the times now, more specifically for now.

I struggled a lot with even wanting to recognize it being Christmas. I guess I still am struggling a bit. I have a list of favorite christmas tv epsidodes I usually wath, cookies to bake, all the christmas trimmings and I’ve yet to do a lot of those things this year.

Thnking about them now as I write this brings a bit of melancholy. It isn’t a total wash thought, I did find a nice christmas mix on spotify and that seems to have helped some.

I think the take-away is christmas is what you make it. Go down the route that leads to the top of Grinch mountain, or bake some cookies and fin your joyu. I have to go preheat my ovn.

5 Minute Mind – Cloud Cover

This is a writing sprint. Please excuse spelling and grammatical errors.

Gazing out my window as I am oft to do, pondering such things like why I am here or whether or not I should make dinner, the skies were kind of blah. A little context, I am a freakish early mornig person so my pondering is often in dawn’s waking hours.

This morning while I Can see the suym rising off to the horizon, there is a thick blanket of low lying, grey clouds. Below the clouds with me, clear sight, and easy to see.

SCanning above, it’s hard to see the brilliant azure luister that i mostly crave. Its so easy for me to get lost in a beautiful. blue sky. As if the very ocean rested above and I am contently drowing within it.

Anyeway….I just got side tracked because I can start to see some blue patches, which is what prompted me to start writing this a few minutes ago. Ok…it made me think about work. About how you can have a good employee with vision and drive and who wants to suceed…but if you havfe shitty middle management they can’t break throughn

5 Minute Mind – What’s in a Day?

This is a writing sprint. Please excuse spelling and grammatical errors.

I awoke to the realization of Monday….but happy about it. THinking about what to write, I beang wondering about how days of the week can have there pre-determined feeling. THat is to say, the pre-determintation that we assign to the day.

It seems sometimes that so powerful is this assignment of feeling that we let it drive the rest of our day. Hell. sometimes even drive the rest of our week.

What if we try to o….What if we try to not marry a day with an emotion at all? In theory that sounds easy to do but in pracxtice, perhaps difficult. With each day goes the tasks assoicated with it, and our feelings with those tasks.

My usijng the word tasks may be revealing in itself. I could have said things or any other daily activity, but chose the word tasks. Perhaps what I need at least is to reframe the way I think about what is in a day for me. How abou you?

5 Minute Mind – Make It

This is a writing sprint. Please excuse spelling and grammatical errors.

In one of the numeros imaginary conversations I have with a friend everyday, all within my head mind you, I thought about time. This friend is the type of person (this part IRL) who cannot seem to find the time to do anything which might be construed as extra. What I mean by that is this friend has a pattern and if something deviates or rather will force them to deviate, then it goes into the “maybe some day” pile when they find time.

I too have fallen down this same rabbit hole in the past, and still sometimes find myself looking for the rope to climb out, but have learned a valuable lesson in life. This lesson, is one which I am trying to share with them, numerous times between imagined and reak conversations.

This friend has asked me “how do i find time….” in reference to a number of things, especially when discussing something new I am doing, such as a cklass or new workout. I thought this mnorning, the lesson is “you dont find time, you make it.”

5 Minute Mind – Shots, Shots, Shots, Shots, Shots, Shots…Everybody.

This is a writing sprint. Please excuse spelling and grammatical errors.

All I want for Chriustmas is a new vaccine, a new vaccine, …you get it. What a time, what a year…but all the smart peole got together in their labs and here we go. In experiencing this coming together, groups working together towards the common goal of helping protect the citizens of the world, my big brain of “hmm, wonder if…” has been chewing on the notion of this same thing happening but wiothout the context of needing to stop a pandemic.

Now, of course there are several different smaller or perhaps subjective is a better word, reasons for motivation; financial gains for pharma, notoriety, protection for the 1% since this affects them too, but even though these aren’t reasons for humanity, they still got the job done.

I realize this is the same type of thinikg that leads to shouts of coirporate greed and capitalism is ultimately good

P.S. Greed is not intrinsically good.

5 Minute Mind – If I can do it…

This is a writing sprint. Please excuse spelling and grammatical errors.

maybe its just me, but something inside my brain gets angry when I hear “if I can do it anyone can.” To me, it’s as if you are saying “I had it harder than anyone, or no one was more ill-prepared than me” therefore me doing it infers it will be easier for you.

I’m sorry, what gives you the right to make that inference? Is this one of those things we’ve become so accustom to saying we just add it to the current case-in-oint?

I have to think that people intend it to come from a place of self deprication, trying to set your mind at ease by saying it was harder, but it still seems to me to come off kinda….I dont know, on the sly.

Like when someone says “Oh bless your heart” they mean “Oh, you poor idiot.” THen what do I know? Whatever it is, if I know it then anyone can..

5 Minute Mind – Use The force

This is a writing sprint. Please excuse spelling and grammatical errors.

SO we have our first space force bases.  Is this really happening?  Is  this same type of wonderment what was experienced by the generations that saw the first rocket launches and moon landings?  Seeing these things of fantasy and magic transformed from page to reality?

I’ve been a Star Trek  AND Star Wars fan since boyhood.  I remember my first space shuttle launch, first seing Colubia go up for its first mission, and seeing its lasts.  The idea of a real Unied Fedration to explore  space excites me great .

The one thing we got wrong thugh, Space Force.  The use of the word force implies militaristic action.  At least here in America, why does so much have to start with its roots in i wnting to blow shit up.

5 Minute Mind – The Sound of Anxiety

This is a writing sprint. Please excuse spelling and grammatical errors.

For the past several months, I have been keeping some type of noise in the background. Living alone during distancing is not all bliss. For most of this time, I’ve used the TV as that background noise. The sound of people talking, etc. filling some sort of pereived need.

A couple weeks ago, during a bad day of anxious feelings, I tried a breathing exercise. REally buying in to it and trying to block out the noise helped. I started trying working without the TV on all the time in little bits.

WOuldn’t you klnow it, the less specific noise I had going on, suich as voices and “real world” sounds, the more eased my anxiety felt. As if the cacophoiny of a perceived real world sound was causing the anxious momehtnts within my head to screamopuder in competition so they too were heard.

The past several days, Ive gone hours without that typo3e of sound. I play brown noise, pink or white noise…which ever is

P.S. More to be said on this. Stay tuned.

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